123+ Best Deadpool Quotes & Captions [Short/Phrase]

Do you love the Merc with the Mouth? If so, you’ll love these Deadpool quotes! These hilarious and quotable sayings will help you stay cheerful and motivated throughout the tough times. Whether you’re feeling down about life or just want to make someone else laugh, these quotes are sure to bring a smile to your face. So why not start quoting Deadpool today?

Deadpool Quotes

Deadpool Quotes

Do you love Deadpool? Well, then you’re going to love this section! We’ve gathered some of the best Deadpool quotes. From funny to inspirational, these Deadpool says and quotes are sure to brighten up your day and make you laugh out loud. So what are you waiting for? Scroll down and grab a copy of our guide today!

  1. (Ryan Reynolds) “You’re welcome, Canada.”
  2. (Ryan Reynolds) “That is such a Juggernaut thing to say.”
  3. Dopinder) “I want to fill my soul. I want to belong to something, like you, Pool sir.”
  4. (Ryan Reynolds) “You know what we need to do? We need to build a f***ing team. We need ’em tough, morally flexible, and young enough so they can carry this franchise 10-12 years.”
  5. (Ryan Reynolds) “Dopinder, you never cease to surprise me. You know, the depth of your heart is extraordinary. We all need a sense of belonging. We all need a genuine sense of home, a place –“
  6. (Ryan Reynolds) “You know what? Doing the right thing is sometimes messy, and f***ed up, and not particularly convenient. So, stay here in Chateau de Virgin while we go get our f*** on.”
  7. (Dopinder) “My body is an instrument of death.”
  8. (Fred Savage) “Gotta prefer Marvel movies.”
  9. (Ryan Reynolds) “– A bomb?”
  10. (Ryan Reynolds) “Zip it, Thanos.”
  11. (Peter) “No. I don’t have one. Um, I just saw the ad. I thought it looked fun.”
  12. (Ryan Reynolds) “Any powers you wanna tell us about? Any, uh –“
  13. (Ryan Reynolds) “We are Marvel.”
  14. (Vanessa) “My IUD.”
  15. (Dopinder) “Remember when I kidnapped Bandhu and threatened him with great violence?”
  16. (Dopinder) “And remember the movie “Interview with the Vampire?””
  17. (Fred Savage) “Yeah, but you’re, you know, Marvel licensed by Fox. It’s kinda like if the Beatles were produced by Nickelback. It’s music, but it sucks.”
  18. (Ryan Reynolds) “Don’t want to.”
  19. (Ryan Reynolds) “I’m sorry, what did you say?”
  20. (Dopinder) “When Tom Cruise fed 10-year-old Kirsten Dunst blood for the first time. And she looked up at his smooth, handsome face and said “I want some more.” Oh, Pool, picture me, a 10-year-old Kirsten Dunst.”
  21. (Ryan Reynolds) “Yeah, you kinda killed him.”
  22. (Ryan Reynolds) “You’re in the big leagues now, kid.”
  23. (Dopinder) “I want to become a contract killer.”
  24. (Dopinder) “f***.”
  25. (Ryan Reynolds) “– I’ll never not picture that. But I can’t wait to never speak of this, as soon as possible.”
  26. (Vanessa) “No, dip-for-brains, my birth control device.”
  27. “Not now, Dopinder.”
  28. “I’m gonna rip you in half now.”
  29. “Oh, well that’s — that’s just the most — beautiful thing that I’ve- I don’t know what this is.”

Best Deadpool Quotes

Best Deadpool Quotes

Deadpool is one of the most popular comic book characters of all time, and his fans are no different. Whether you love him for his irreverent humor or just appreciate his badass attitude, these Deadpool quotes will have you grinning from ear to ear. So why not add a few best Deadpool quotes !They’ll definitely brighten up your day and maybe even make someone else’s day too!

  1. (Colossus) “We have rules. You are not judge, jury or executioner.”
  2. (Ryan Reynolds) “I don’t know how to thank you, but I do know how to hug you.”
  3. (Ryan Reynolds) “Go home, Sugar Bear, go home.”
  4. (Ryan Reynolds) “Well, I guess we found something you’re not better at.”
  5. (Ryan Reynolds) “f*** your rules. I fight for what’s right, and sometimes you gotta fight dirty.”
  6. (Ryan Reynolds) “Come on. Pelvis to pelvis. Let’s go tip to tip. There we go, the kids call this docking.”
  7. (Dopinder) “I want some more.”
  8. (Ryan Reynolds) “You killed Black Tom, you racist son of a bitch.”
  9. (Ryan Reynolds) “f*** it. Superhero landing comin’ up.”
  10. (Ryan Reynolds) “I believe him.”
  11. (Josh Brolin) “There’s a knife in your dick, yeah.”
  12. (Ryan Reynolds) “We’re definitely naming our kid Cher.”
  13. (Ryan Reynolds) “Can you see it? Do you see that beautiful bright light? There it is.”
  14. (Ryan Reynolds) “Because I’ve been inside you. That came out wrong. I’ve been inside your shoes, which is also off-putting.”
  15. (Firefist) “How do you know what I want?”
  16. (Ryan Reynolds) “Hello, superpower.”
  17. (Juggernaut) “Now I’m gonna shove the red guy up the old guy.”
  18. (Ryan Reynolds) “Hey, big guy, the sun’s getting real low.”
  19. (Ryan Reynolds) “f*** Wolverine. First he rides my coattails with the R-rating, and then, that hairy motherf***er ups the ante by dying. What a dick. Well, guess what, Wolvie? I’m dying in this one, too.”
  20. (Ryan Reynolds) “Yes. Here we go. Bring it in.”
  21. (Ryan Reynolds) “I bet you do, Brown Panther.”
  22. (Ryan Reynolds) “Oh, that’s the sun. Don’t stare directly into that.”
  23. (Ryan Reynolds) “I know what you’re thinking: “I’m so glad I left the kiddos at home.” But that’s where you’d be wrong. That babysitter of yours is high as f*** right now. And believe it or not, Deadpool 2 is a family film. True story. And every big family film starts — with a vicious murder. Bambi, The Lion King, Saw 7.”
  24. (Ryan Reynolds) “Put your hands behind your knees and get down on your head now.”
  25. (Ryan Reynolds) “Well, I’m not even going to attempt that. But I did take eighth grade Spanish, so donde esta la biblioteca? Which literally translates to: I don’t bargain, pumpkin-f***er.”
  26. (Ryan Reynolds) “Is there a knife in my dick?”
  27. (Ryan Reynolds) “I don’t speak Cantonese, Mr –“
  28. (Ryan Reynolds) “Ooh. Ah, f***, f***, f***, f***, f***. That is so not practical.”
  29. (Ryan Reynolds) “Oh s***, that f***ing does it.”
  30. (Josh Brolin) “No.”

Short Deadpool Quotes

Short Deadpool Quotes

Do you love Deadpool, but hate how long it takes to get through all of his quotes? Well, we’ve got you covered! In this section, we’ll provide you with a list of short Deadpool quotes that will get you laughing and thinking at the same time. From clever one-liners to hilarious puns, you’re sure to enjoy these short excerpts from the Merc with a Mouth. So sit back and enjoy!

  1. “Just once, I going to find a planet where people are worse than me at everything, a whole bunch of functional idiots.”
  2. “Hey, big guy, the sun’s getting real low.”
  3. “You’re so dark. Are you sure you’re not from the DC universe?”
  4. “Kids give us a chance of being better than we used to be.”
  5. “I was fighting a caped badass, but then we discovered that his mom is named Martha, too.”
  6. “Listen to the pain. It’s both history teacher and fortune teller.”
  7. “Hey, look at me. You are not your father.”
  8. “With this collar on, my superpower is just unbridled cancer. Give me a bow and arrow and I’m basically Hawkeye.”
  9. “I just saw the ad and thought it looked fun.”
  10. “Doing the right thing is messy. You want to fight for what’s right, sometimes you have to fight dirty.”

Deadpool Catchphrases

  1. “Guy came in here looking for you. Real Grim Reaper-type. I don’t know. Might further the plot.”
  2. “I didn’t ask to be super, and I’m no hero. But when you find out your worst enemy is after your best girl, the time has come to be a fucking superhero.”
  3. “Here’s the thing, Life is an endless series of train wrecks with only brief commercial-like breaks of happiness. This had been the ultimate commercial break. Which meant it was time to return to our regularly scheduled programming.”
  4. “Okay guys, I only have twelve bullets, so you’re all going to have to share!”
  5. “I didn’t just get the cure to el cancer, I got the cure to el everything.”
  6. “I want to die a natural death at the age of 102 – like the city of Detroit.”
  7. “House blowing up builds character.”
  8. Looks are everything! Ever heard Dave Beckham speak? It’s like he mouth-sexed a can of helium. You think Ryan Reynolds got this far on a superior acting method?”
  9. “Sorry, I use humor to deflect my insecurities. Plus, I’m hilarious, so don’t hate.”
  10. “You can’t buy love, but you can rent it for three minutes!”
  11. “Let’s dance…and by dance I mean kill each other!”
  12. “Listen, Al, if I never see you again, I want you to know that I love you very much. I also buried 1,600 kilos of cocaine somewhere in the apartment – right next to the cure for blindness. Good luck.”

Funniest Deadpool Quotes

  1. Oh, hello there! I bet you’re wondering, why the red suit? Well, that’s so bad guys can’t see me bleed!”
  2. “When I’m finished parts will have to grow back you.”
  3. “You ate breakfast, yes? Breakfast is most important meal of day. Here, protein bar. Good for bones. Deadpool may try to break yours.”
  4. “I do not hate everything about the world. Just every show they’ve ever put on after ‘Friends’.”
  5. “You don’t need to be a superhero to get the girl. The right girl will bring out the hero in you.”
  6. “Wow, this is such a big house, but I only ever see the two of you here. It’s like the studio didn’t have enough money for any more X-Men…”
  7. “There’s no easy way to say this… I’m pregnant, Trevor!”
  8. “Yeah. That is a gun in my pants. But that doesn’t mean I’m not happy to see you…”
  9. “I am crazy, or is your hand really small?”
  10. “The worst part about cancer isn’t what it does to you. But what it does to the people you love. Who knew if this guy could save my life, but I knew there was only one way I could save hers.”
  11. “Oh, hello there! I bet you’re wondering, why the red suit? Well, that’s so bad guys can’t see me bleed!”

Deadpool Lines

  1. “WAIT! You may be wondering why the red suit. Well, that’s so bad guys don’t see me bleed.”
  2. “Today was about as much fun as a sandpaper dildo.”
  3. “Whatever they did to me made me totally indestructible… and completely unfuckable.”
  4. “Love is a beautiful thing. When you find it, the whole world smells like a daffodil daydream.”
  5. “I just want to get to know the real you. Not the short, 2-dimensional sex object peddled by Hollywood.”
  6. “Life is an endless series of train-wrecks with only brief, commercial-like breaks of happiness.”
  7. “I swear to God, I’m gonna find you in the next life, and I’m gonna boombox Careless Whisper outside your window. Wham!”
  8. “Nothing could be deeper than life to understand that you can put your whole life to know what’s life! We have hand-picked some thoughtful Deadpool quotes that made you have a serious thought about life.”
  9. “I personally believe those who are funniest, they are deep philosophical somewhere.”
  10. “you don’t need to be a superhero to get the girl, the right girl will bring out the hero in you.”

Deadpool Movie Quotes

  1. “It’s weird I only ever see two of you. Almost like the studio couldn’t afford another X-Man.”
  2. ” But some of the best love stories start with a murder.”
  3. “The worst part about cancer isn’t what it does to you, but what it does to the people you love.”
  4. “McAvoy or Stewart? These timelines are confusing.”
  5. “You’re about to be killed by a Zamboni.”
  6. “Please don’t make the super-suit green… or animated!”
  7. “What are you expecting? Sam Jackson showing up in an eyepatch and a saucy little leather number? Go!”
  8. “You’re probably thinking, ‘My boyfriend said this was a superhero movie but that guy in the suit just turned that other guy into a… kebab!'”
  9. “Ladies and gentlemen, I give you… me! Deadpool.”
  10. “Negasonic Teenage… That’s the coolest name ever!”
  11. “I want to die a natural death at the age of 102 – like the city of Detroit.”
  12. “Fourth wall break inside of a fourth wall break? That’s like… 16 walls!”
  13. “All dinosaurs feared the T-Rex.”
  14. “If I ever decide to become a crime-fighting … swizzler, who rooms with a bunch of other little whiners at Neverland Mansion with some creepy, old, bald, Heaven’s Gate…..on that day, I’ll send you your shiny, happy… friend request.”

Deadpool Phrase

  1. “Take it from me, the guy they call the Merc with a Mouth… sometimes your best weapon is shutting up!”
  2. “Attention circus patrons! I have come from another dimension to take your daredevil pooch. He is needed to save many worlds.”
  3. “So far marriage is pretty awesome, and the new crib is like living in a Tim Burton movie.”
  4. “You should know I’m undefeated against opponents with nose rings.”
  5. “Please, Al, a little warning next time… Some of us aren’t blind y’know?”
  6. “My common sense is tingling.”
  7. “Hey, if you looked like Ryan Reynolds crossed with a shar-pei, you’d understand!”
  8. “He’s not punking me! Okay… he punked me a little bit. But c’mon! How’m I supposed to do my thing when he’s already doin’ my thing!”

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Conclusion

There you have it! Some of the most inspiring and funny Deadpool quotes ever. From inspiring to hilarious, these are sure to make everyone’s day. In fact, we cannot get enough of them! Also comments below!

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